The last few days have caused me to do lots of thinking about what's really important in life. It's not like I've never thought about this before but sometimes it's so easy to get caught up in all the day to day stuff that I forget the big picture. I lack eternal perspective. We have a neighbor and friend who has been an amazing example to everyone around her. She and her husband have been faced with one of the most difficult situations you can imagine, and they have demonstrated so much courage and faith. It has truly been inspiring. Today was the funeral for their baby daughter, Joy, who entered this life and left it in the same day. To read more about this incredible family you can check out her blog http://ourjourneywithjoy.blogspot.com/. (I caution you only to do this when you have some time and lots of Kleenex.)
On the day of Joy's birth I was having the worst mom day I've had in quite a while. Lately I feel like I've been wrapped so tight, with so much going on, and I've struggled to let go of that and have fun and count my blessings. I've been worrying about every little thing, feeling the chaos of having four kids so close in age, and I've been spending a lot of time feeling tired, frustrated, and inefficient. (Now before you think I'm spending all my time yelling and beating the kids...it's not been that bad!) I certainly have not been "Finding Joy in the Journey" though. I've been going through the motions, helping with the homework, reading to the kids, getting them where they need to go, keeping them clean and fed, but I haven't enjoyed it as much as I should. This is my life! I'm going to have small kids at home for the foreseeable future. I need to live and love. My kids are not perfect, but they are mine and I couldn't love them more. I have been entrusted with them. They forgive my many faults and love me no matter what. I am so blessed. So I'm turning over a new leaf. I'm sure this won't be the last time I find myself in a rut, making mistakes, feeling overwhelmed, but I'm recognizing that now and making a change for the better. That's all I can do. Today in her talk Breanne quoted President Monson. He said, "This is our one and only chance at mortal life—here and now. The longer we live, the greater is our realization that it is brief. Opportunities come, and then they are gone. I believe that among the greatest lessons we are to learn in this short sojourn upon the earth are lessons that help us distinguish between what is important and what is not. I plead with you not to let those important things pass you by as you plan for that illusive and nonexistent future when you will have time to do all that you want to do. Instead, find joy in the journey—now." To read the rest of this talk click here Finding Joy in the Journey.
Wow, I don't think any words could hit closer to my heart than these did today. I am a lucky person with a great husband, four beautiful kids, and a wonderful family. My life is full of good things. I have new resolve to enjoy my life as it is today—every sticky, chaotic, crazy, child infused minute of it. I want my kids to have memories of a happy mom that loved and laughed, and I'd like to avoid an entire head of gray hairs!